Getting through the storm of overwhelm

A whirling and swirling storm around you of tasks, priorities, and never-ending to-do lists seems to have crept up out of nowhere and you’re now in the middle of it.  You’re bending to the point of over-extended with the winds flexing in every direction but not making any headway.  You might be in overwhelm.

Overwhelm is the feeling of being overtaken by too much. It can feel like you’re overstretched, buried, or even drowning with too much to do, think, or manage. It can feel like overwhelm has come on out of the blue.  The reality is overwhelm can be like the parable of the boiling frog, the heat creeps up slowly until you feel overtaken and no longer have the ability to do anything about it.  It can include feelings of exhaustion, anxiety, panic, anger, or even breakdown and burnout. I want to help you see how you can take small steps out of overwhelm. 

Some of the things I’m hearing lead to overwhelm for leaders recently are attracting and retaining great talent, or any talent with increasing demands to produce more, faster, better. There are day-to-day challenges that need to be managed with back-to-back meetings and to-do lists that get bumped to tomorrow, next week, and next month.   They are talking about needing to reprioritize but have 32 strategic urgent initiatives. On top, there are family commitments, personal stressors, and challenges. Where does one start? I keep hearing “I just need to find more time”.  You can’t.  We all get the same amount of time – 24 hours a day, 7 days a week and 365 days a year – it’s what we do with our time and how we talk to ourselves that makes all the difference. 

Notice early

Before you can take steps to address overwhelm, you’ll need to know you’re in it and hopefully early before you’re fully immersed in the storm of it. Regularly take a reflective moment each week and check in on how you’re managing and feeling.  Are you working more hours? Are you working more after hours at home? Are you sleeping well at night or thinking about work tossing and turning? Are your “to-do lists” growing? Are you able to recharge and relax in the evenings, weekends, or on vacation?

A great tool is to rank yourself each week on the Yerkes-Dodson Stress Curve that assesses performance and stress levels or once a month using the Perceived Stress Scale.

Talk about it

Many leaders aren’t talking about feelings of overwhelm and if they do, no one talks about changing it.  By not talking about it, leaders begin to feel isolated and can start telling themselves that they are the only ones that can’t manage it all.  Talking about it helps you process how you feel but also confirms that you are not the only one struggling with too much.

Next, talk with your leader and your peers about changing the overwhelm for you, your team, and direct reports.  Reprioritizing is rarely if ever the solution but the strategy I hear most executive teams go to first.  Your issue is likely not a time management issue, it’s a too many things, too many demands, or too many initiatives issue. 

Set Boundaries

One strategy to address the overwhelm is to put some boundaries in place.  Boundaries could be around the meetings you attend, scheduling in “thinking time” and “desk time” in your day, or the amount of work that you do after hours including checking in on emails and messages after hours.  Boundaries also include having candid conversations about what is most important and what needs to stop in order to achieve that even if the other things are noble and worthy.  You can’t do more with less unless you have new processes or other tools to make things more efficient.  Focus on doing less better. 

Reframe your mindset

To address overwhelm is to calm the storm in your mind. If you feel there is nothing in your control, you always have control of your own mind. It’s easy to get caught up in feeling a victim to overwhelm and I want you to know you have choice.  Ask yourself – Am I focusing on the problem or what I want? Shifting your thinking from “why me?” to “what now” can help you identify what you want next and explore one baby step to move forward.

Take 1 to 3 baby steps

On my most challenging days, I pull out a sticky note and write one to three baby steps I commit to completing that day.  The rest of the “to do list” gets put away until those baby steps are complete.  This gives me a sense of control and accomplishment that leads to feelings of self-worth and fulfillment to counter the winds of whatever storm I’m in.

Being in the storm of overwhelm is challenging and can come out of nowhere.  You have the ability to calm the storm by talking about it with others, settings small boundaries, reframing your mindset, and then taking small actions. We all experience overwhelm, by learning to manage through it, you’ll become a better leader by modeling for others to do the same and even prevent it for their teams in the future.